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   News in brief
   This just fell in.

  

  

  PROMISING RISE
   IN ESTATE PRICES

   The ocean rose ten meters across the planet yesterday, making all former coastlines on Earth inhabitable.
   The world's land mass has been reduced with forty percent over night.
   It's expected to help solve the world's hunger problem.

  

  

   Drug shares
   shows promise

   A new deadly strain of the AIDS virus infecting people through air and killing within days has just reached London.
   Fatalities are expected to eventually reach the seven or ten figures.

  

  

   Enormous real-estate areas
   about to be liberated

   A new, artificial chemical that will kill 6 billion people within 2020 was today approved as an ingredient in food by the American Food and Drug Administration (FDA).
   It's expected to help solve the world's hunger problem.

  


And now SPORTS!

  

  

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